Knowing your limits

This page has information and advice about how you can set your limits and maintain your boundaries around party and play. 

When we take drugs like G or crystal, the rush we get can be powerful. Once we start, it can feel easy to keep going. Sometimes it feels like there’s always another party to go to, more drugs to take, more people to connect with. Being honest with yourself about what your limits are and thinking of some strategies to put in place to help you stick within your limits is a good idea. Setting strong boundaries and limits reduces potential negative impacts on your health, your money, your relationships and can make the comedown a lot easier to deal with.

Some things to think about before party and play

1. How long do you want to party for?

This might be one night, or a couple of days. Decide on a time period and put strategies in place to help you to stick to your limit. You might want to make an agreement with a friend or set your own curfew.

2. How much do you want to use?

Once feeling the effects of drugs and when effects wear off it can be tempting to keep using more and more. If you use more it is likely that you will also use for longer, spend more money and have a harsher comedown. Have a think about how much you want to use ahead of time, tell a friend or the people you are partying with and do your best to stick to that limit. Consider asking a friend to call you or message you at a certain time to of your session to remind you of your limits, this might help to keep you accountable.

3. How much do you want to spend?

Partying costs money, the drugs cost, cabs and Ubers all cost too. You want to think about how much you can afford to spend before you start. Be honest with yourself. Think about whether you have paid your bills and your rent, will you have enough money left for the rest of the week or month?  Some people choose to just take cash out with them when partying and leave their cards at home. Have a think about whether this might work for you.

4. What kind of sex are you comfortable with?

Drugs like crystal and G can increase our sex drives and lower our inhibitions. We might find that when we’re using them, we’re having more wild sex than we otherwise would. This can be part of the appeal. This said, do have a think about what you are comfortable with. You might have boundaries around the type of play you want, the sexual health protection that you are going to use or who you are going to have sex with. Be clear about this with yourself ahead of time and communicate this to your partners before and during a session. There more information on sexual assault and consent here.

Remember no one else can set your limits, only you can. By the same token, you can ask others to help you stick to your limits but ultimately it is up to you.

Information on this page has been developed in consultation with community members and taken from the Terrence Higgins website Friday/Monday and the Institute of Many Resource Turning Tina